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August Pamplona's Journal
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Below are the 10 most recent journal entries recorded in August Pamplona's LiveJournal:

Monday, September 21st, 2009
10:53 pm
Fuck me, I have no idea!
So I open this book and read the following caption:
"A modern table levitation. Demonstrating a table-rise at home for scientist Dr. Robert Smith (senior fellow at University College, London). He sat quietly for a few moments afterwards and then said, 'Fuck me, I have no idea.'"

And what I am wondering is whether most readers would even realize that "Fuck me, I have no idea." might be the most scientific statement which can be made in that context.

Surely, saying that it was done magically might seem to some to more resemble a scientific statement (see Intelligent Design movement) since it seems like some sort of hypothesis and generating hypotheses is supposed to be a major part of what science is supposed to be built upon. However, in the great majority of times when magic is involved the practical effect is to stop inquiry (there's really nothing to investigate because it's just magic and thus beyond science --not that I even agree with that reasoning, but I digress). When one says "fuck me, I have no idea" it's really saying that one observer at one point in time has no idea and it implicitly leaves open the possibility that other observers at other points in time may fare better.

And, of course, "fuck me, I have no idea" might, in some instances, be all that one will ever be able to say. And that's perfectly okay as well.
Sunday, August 9th, 2009
10:11 pm
Instant mashed potatoes
This recipe takes about 10 minutes,... maybe less. I refer to it as "instant" not because it takes no time to produce but because the process of mashing the potatoes is instantaneous.

Your choice of potatoes might be important. One of the red skinned varieties or a golden variety might be best (I used Klondike Golddust) as I suspect a baking potato like a Russet might not produce the desired moist, buttery texture.

As for the choice of a pressure cooker, you need one which can be opened while there's some pressure inside.
  • Cut up some potatoes. put them in the pressure cooker.
  • Add a few tablespoons of water. Basically, you just want to cover the bottom of the cooker but not much more than that.
Warning: It is extremely important that only a few tablespoons of water be added. If there is a substantial amount of water in the pressure cooker, you will be seriously burned when attempting this recipe. In fact, you may be burned even if you follow my directions exactly.
  • Close the pressure cooker and set it on very high heat.
  • When the pressure inside reaches 15 psi, turn down the heat to a level sufficient to maintain 15 psi but not much higher than that and set a timer for 5 minutes.
  • When the five minutes at 15 psi are over, turn off the heat, release steam and after some steam has been released but not before pressure has fully equalized, remove the pressure cooker cover.
  • You will find that the potato deposited all around your kitchen work area after you removed the pressure cooker cover to be tender and buttery and reduced to small chunks which have been instantly mashed by explosive decompression.
Bon appétit!
Friday, April 11th, 2008
10:56 pm
Springbok, you are rather cute. Sorry about that whole eating you thing. You were tasty. No hard feelings, I hope.
Sunday, February 24th, 2008
11:51 am
Nature red in tooth and claw...
Epic battle between predator and prey:

Epic battle between predator and prey.

The onslaught temporarily halted:

The onslaught temporarily halted.

The tables are turned, once again:

The tables are turned, once again.

Budgie delivers crushing bite to the back of the skull while
leaving brainstem intact (thus preserving autonomic functions):

Budgie delivers crushing bite to the back of the skull while leaving brainstem intact (thus preserving autonomic functions).

Budgie stands victorious:

Budgie stands victorious.

Budgie oviposits in zombified kitten thus providing sustenance
for the soon to emerge budgie larvae until they reach maturity:

Budgie oviposits in zombified kitten thus providing sustenance for the soon to emerge budgie larvae until they reach maturity.

        It's all from Cute Overload, of course.
Sunday, May 6th, 2007
1:55 pm
I love Daryl Hannah
Daryl Hannah visits Mecca:

I now love Daryl Hannah even more than I ever did (don't be put off by the first 30 seconds, it gets better).
Sunday, February 11th, 2007
7:57 am
I feel so bummed! weaselpanties told me that thepencilneck told seidhr that they saw me backstabbing rogus_ratus. Yeah right! If I get my hands on them I'm going 2 whup asses!

This entry automatically generated by the LJ Drama Generator!
Sunday, August 20th, 2006
4:28 pm
Dead plants
My baby orchids died. They were removed from their vial during the beginning of March. I had two instead of the expected one. A dirge for them, the quadruply dead in that they died so young.
Tuesday, August 1st, 2006
8:12 pm
I have changed my haircut. I will not longer use the #2 clipper guard setting (7 mm.) on the top of my head and the #1 clipper (4 mm.) guard setting everywhere else. From now on I will use the #1 clipper guard setting all around.
Wednesday, May 17th, 2006
10:44 pm
Body Worlds
I have purchased tickets for Body Worlds at the Science Museum of Minnesota for the 24th.
Saturday, March 25th, 2006
9:46 pm
My dog died.
My grandmother's dog, Loki, (essentially, my dog as well) died yesterday.

I woke up. I heard Loki breathing loudly. I investigated the source of the sound and found it to be in the computer room. The door to the room was closed but not tightly. The waste basket and a few things had been knocked over but I could not immediately see Loki. I think that, for some reason, he went into this room and then somehow pushed the door closed, perhaps becoming agitated and knocking things down in the room. There are twin beds in this room and there is a small nightstand in between them.

With a closer look, I found that Loki was hiding under the nightstand. I thought that I might have some difficulty removing him from under this as he was sort of wedged in there (since this is a far too small nightstand for a dog this size to crawl under) but I was able to do it. I tried to get him to move but he exhibited a great deal of bilateral weakness in the back legs. He also exhibited extreme apathy. His breathing seemed somewhat distressed. He'd make an odd sort of groan every minute or so. He did not otherwise seem to be in pain (though he might have simply been too apathetic to show it if he had been in pain).

I picked him up and carried him downstairs fearing that he might otherwise try to follow and, in his current state, fall downstairs. In retrospect he probably was apathetic enough that he would not have chosen to follow but I guess he would have had to come down eventually anyway. I left him on the kitchen floor (linoleum type flooring).

I really had expected him to perk up enough to attempt to eat but he did not. If anything, I could no longer even prompt him to try to stand up. I even offered a cheese doggie treat (which he seemed to like a lot in the past) but he showed no interest in it whatsoever. I moved him over to the living room unto a rug because I figured that might be friendlier flooring than the kitchen flooring. I left him in lying belly down with his back legs in a somewhat unnatural position.

I went back upstairs and informed my grandmother that Loki was not well and that she should call the veterinarian soon after I left for school. I went back downstairs and he was in the same position I had left him but sleeping and with normal seeming breathing. I went upstairs to the bathroom and took a shower.

When I got out of the bathroom, I saw that it was time for me to leave for class. I went back downstairs and saw Loki lying on his side in a more relaxed looking position. It was much like the way he would have often lain in the past except for the fact that he was actually stiff and not breathing. I imagine he must have arrived to that position in some sort of weird, dying paroxysm.

I went back upstairs and told my grandmother that Loki had died. I thought that I was late for class and I left leaving the dog in the living room. I felt like shit about having done that. I guess I had not been thinking very clearly as it only would have taken me 5 minutes (and, as it turned out, I arrived at class with five minutes to spare) to take him out of the living room.

When I got back, I took him out of the living room and put him outside. Then I went to bed for a while (that's just what I felt like doing). Then I dug a hole next to a rose bush and put him in there. It was dark by the time I stopped digging. I added some dirt back to the hole but I did not finish it that day.

Today, I finished putting back the soil that I had dug out yesterday. I even planted an eggplant that I had overwintering indoors on top of the pile of soil. I put one of those Wall-O-Water things around it and I am hoping that that will be enough to counteract the nuttyness inherent in planting such a plant while there is still snow around.

Hopefully whoever buys the farm place will leave the rose bush alone and appreciate it. Personally, being dumped in a hole next to a rose bush seems a much better way to be disposed of than being tossed in a coffin and put into some idiotic concrete vault. Either that or being ground up into a nitrogen supplement to make some hippie type happy about his harvest [enter Charlton Heston: "Green Bud is people!"].

Current Mood: contemplative
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